Monday, February 25, 2013

Modern Dating

Photo borrowed from here:
 Those of you who know me IRL are aware that I am single.  You are also aware that there really isn't much out there in Singleville from which to choose...especially when one lives in a VERY rural area, and one's job involves linking senior citizens with community services, providing exactly ZERO chance of meeting someone who is single, has a job, and doesn't need a ride to the orthopaedist.

Combine those elements with the fact that I really don't enjoy the whole bar scene, and prefer to eat out at 5:00 p.m. so I can get home before dark, and you have a recipe for living the rest of my freaking life alone!! 

Just when you (meaning ME) and your (meaning MY) single friends begin to try to convince yourselves that there really IS someone out there who is just right for you, and that happiness is just a unicorn and a pound of glitter away, life steps in with yet another reminder that it's all really one big lesson...

Today, at work, an 83 year old resident came to my office.  He brought me a small paperback Farmer's Almanac cookbook...which was very thoughtful.  He then proceeded to ask me out to dinner.  Seriously?  Is this what I have to look forward to?  Am I destined, at 46, to be responsible for false teeth removal and daily Ben Gay application?  I really thought I would be able to shirk THOSE duties for at least a few more years.  And PLEASE don't get me started on ADL assistance...especially the whole toileting issue.  I don't mind feeding you pablum, but I would prefer that you be able to wipe your own butt.  At least on the first date.  Is that too much to ask?

The lesson?  Set the bar low.  You won't ever be disappointed.  

Delivah me!